Everyday I get up, it feels like a to do list.
That's how I was feeling for the past three weeks. Everyday, there's something to do. A list of things needed to be done. Emails. Follow-ups. Plan. Make decisions.
I haven't posted as much in the past few weeks. I went to Cambodia on a Vision Quest with Ratanak from Jan 22nd till Feb 4th. I also visited Singapore and Hong Kong for a week before I came back.
Afterwards, it was busy. I had my course, Missions in a Global Context, to catch up. Books to read. Topics to research. Papers to write.
Between getting use to back in Canada, God gave me a wonderful surprise.
Before going to Cambodia, I met up with a missionary from Overseas Missionary Fellowship (OMF). He heard of my stories and my interest in missions. When I came back, he offered me an IT role in OMF Headquarters in Singapore. It is a two year role helping their IT infrastructure. I took a look at the role description and it is exactly what I am doing at my work.
It's almost divine.
Divine because I prayed to God to send me overseas for 2-3 year. I am single. I am mobile. I can go.
Divine because Singapore is close to Cambodia. Though a part of me want to go back to Cambodia to help, I don't know if my health can handle it. I had a liver transplant and if I have any complications, who knows how I can get help. Singapore, on the other hand, is clean in that aspect. I still ask God if this plan makes sense. Use Singapore for a base to go to Cambodia. It's only two hour flight. I have no idea what I can do in Cambodia. The need there is much more than here. At least in Canada if I need to find a church, I can walk down the street.
Divine also because of someone I met in Singapore. My friend said...'OMF had many offices in around the world. US, Canada and Taiwain....and God sent you to Singapore'
Divine because this is exactly what I am doing at my current job. Translate business requirement to technical requirement. Train users to use the system.
And so the past few weeks were busy filling out forms, checking them twice, ask my family doc, ask my dentist, ask my friends for reference.
Among the ministries I am engage in. Organizing a summer retreat for my congregation. Lead University Fellowship. Help out at Bible Quiz.....I am full.
Of all the things I miss, I missed those quiet times when I could get up early on Sat morning, grabbed my bike and go for a ride. The quiet times I spent on the road and it was just me and Him.
Today I had a realization that if God is opening all the doors, I would be gone in two months. That's fast. I laugh (like Sarah) because I don't think that's possible.
My friend, studying MBA in a prestigious University, found out I am going to OMF and the role is a faith based role (aka I don't get paid. God provides the funding)...in which he asked, "Cliff, what about retirement? What are you going to do about that?"
I thought for a sec. Trying to say it in a gentle way over Gmail chat. Who am I following God or money? If God calls me to go, I go. I bang home with Matthew 6:30-32. What am I seeking? Retirement or His Kingdom? I also joke with him that he's only 30 and he's too young to worry about retirement. Side note: I don't disagree with retirement. It is just in the light of the world, when the world makes less than 2 dollars a day, and what Jesus commands of the rich...retirement seems a minor factor when it comes to His Kingdom.
He told me I am crazy (I don't disagree). At the same time we both agreed that if we read the Bible, this just make sense.
I can say I am scared. I joke that this is what happens when you pray too much. He answers. In the beginning of Luke, Zechariah, the father of John the Baptist, could not believe that the Lord would give him and Elizabeth a child because they were old. The irony is that they pray for it. Now the Lord answers and he was afraid and could not believe it....
Zechariah asked the angel, “How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.”
I am still wondering why I am so scared. Probably because He does answer. Going to Cambodia. My blood pressure. My health. This role. God moves so fast I can barely keep up. In a year, everything changes.
The guilty side is that a part of me don't want to change. I am comfortable here. I am comfortable in Mississauga. In my job. In my things. I don't want to give it up. Then I remind myself, these things are only temporary comfort. They are minor when it comes to the Glory Of God. And I remembered...vaguely of those times when I experience His Grace. Everything else does pales in comparison to that. Why would I want to go back? There's no joy there. It might feel comfortable but no joy.
So here I wait.....a while ago I made a post on four doors in March 15th.
These are the four doors God have to open if I will be gone to Singapore....
If you are the praying type, please pray for me. Following Christ is definitely an adventure of a life time. I wouldn't want it any other way. Someday, I wanted to look back to this day and I can say to myself that I took one small leap of faith for Him. I still think I am a mouse of faith :O)
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.