What does it mean to help the poor?

This has been the question on my mind for a while now....

Tomorrow, my wife and I will share about poverty to teenagers at a school.  As I am preparing my slides, I re-read When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty without Hurting the Poor...and Yourself.

The author used a classic illustration of how sometimes our good intentions might do more harm than help!


And now we have come to a very central point: one of the biggest problems in many poverty-alleviation efforts is that their design and implementation exacerbates the poverty of being of the economically rich—their god-complexes—and the poverty of being of the economically poor—their feelings of inferiority and shame.  The way that we act toward the economically poor often communicates—albeit unintentionally—that we are superior and they are inferior. In the process we hurt the poor and ourselves. And here is the clincher: this dynamic is likely to be particularly strong whenever middle-to-upper-class, North American Christians try to help the poor, given these Christians' tendency toward a Western, materialistic perspective of the nature of poverty.

This point can be illustrated with the story of Creekside Community Church, a predominantly Caucasian congregation made up of young urban professionals in the downtown area of an American city. Being in the Christmas spirit, Creekside Community Church decided to reach out to the African-American residents of a nearby housing project, which was characterized by high rates of unemployment, domestic violence, drug and alcohol abuse, and teenage pregnancy. A number of the members of Creekside expressed some disdain for the project residents, and all of the members were fearful of venturing inside. But Pastor Johnson insisted that Jesus cared for the residents of this housing project and that Christmas was the perfect time to show His compassion.

 But what could they do to help? Believing that poverty is primarily a lack of material resources—the last row in table 2.1—the members of Creekside Community Church decided to address this poverty by buying Christmas presents for the children in the housing project. Church members went door to door, singing Christmas carols and delivering wrapped toys to the children ineach apartment. Although it was awkward at first, the members of Creekside were moved by the big smiles on the children's faces and were encouraged by the warm reception of the mothers. In fact, the congregation felt so good about the joy they had brought that they decided to expand this ministry, delivering baskets of candy at Easter and turkeys at Thanksgiving. 

Unfortunately, after several years, Pastor Johnson noticed that he was struggling to find enough volunteers to deliver the gifts to the housing project. At the congregational meeting, he asked the members why their enthusiasm was waning, but it was difficult to get a clear answer. Finally, one member spoke up: "Pastor, we are tired of trying to help these people out. We have been bringing them things for several years now, but their situation never improves. They just sit there in the same situation year in and year out. Have you ever noticed that there are no men in the apartments when we deliver the toys? The residents are all unwed mothers who just keep having babies in order to collect bigger and bigger welfare checks. They don't deserve our help."

In reality, there was a different reason that there were few men in the apartments when the toys were delivered. Oftentimes, when the fathers of the children heard the Christmas carols outside their front doors and saw the presents for their kids through the peepholes, they were embarrassed and ran out the back doors of their apartments. For a host of reasons, low-income African-AmericanAfrican-American males sometimes struggle to find and keep jobs. This often contributes to a deep sense of shame and inadequacy, both of which make it even more difficult to apply for jobs. The last thing these fathers needed was a group of middle-to-upper-class Caucasians providing Christmas presents for their children, presents that they themselves could not afford to buy. In trying to alleviate material poverty through the giving of these presents, Creekside Community Church increased these fathers' poverty of being. Ironically, this likely made the fathers even less able to apply for a job, thereby exacerbating the very material poverty that Creekside was trying to solve!

Fikkert, Brian; Corbett, Steve (2009-06-24). When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty Without Hurting the Poor . . . and Yourself. Moody Publishers. Kindle Edition.

This is not a post to be cynical about every project we endeavour to stop poverty.  Rather, we need to be discerning and analytical whether what we are doing really does help to stop poverty.  The point of stopping poverty is to love our neighbours as ourselves.  This include the poor as well.

Six Months

A long overdue post. Sorry. Sometimes, the longer I don’t blog, the longer I don’t want to. It is probably because I feel like I missed so much already. But sometimes it is good to come back to an old habit that helps you jot down and reflect upon a portion of your life.

Six months. I’ve been married for six months. I cannot imagine how things have changed so much in six months.

As Wai Jia and I spent last weekend celebrating being married to each other for six months, I started to realize how much I have changed. I understand a lot more about her which I never had before. I discovered there’s a lot more I do not know about her, about myself and about us. Above all, I am in awe at how God has brought us together.

After watching our video, many people often think our story is a fairy tale. In a way, it does portray that things were dreamy and beyond both our imaginations. When I first read about Wai Jia on her blog, I just thought it would be nice if we were together but never seriously considered the steps I would take to court her. In fact, there were many moments where we  sought the Lord when it  concerned us. Those moments, though, were not just asking the Lord to bring us together. We simply surrendered our relationship to the Lord and let Him lead.

For me, these spiritual experiences and lessons taught me greatly about our Father’s heart and His Ways. He wants us to trust Him. He wants us to follow Him. He wants us to surrender to Him. He wants us to love Him so much that wherever He goes, we will follow. There’s a strong security and assurance in this Love. Perhaps this is why Jesus tells His disciples to abide in His love. I find it amazing, how the idea of love (agape), the sacrificial love, is one of the key characteristics of the Holy One. Just reading 1 Corinthians 13 is a small glimpse of this love. It is not a doctrine too far for us to grasp. It is real and it is genuine. This love from Him is the solid ground where we can build our livesupon.

I used to be one of those people who was so tired of listening to 1 Corinthians 13 at a wedding. I would tighten up and tell myself, this is out of context. Though it is true that Paul wasn’t writing this letter with marriage in mind,  I cannot help but see that our marriage is filled with that same agape love. Marriage should be the spiritual union of two people formed through this type of love. And why not? After all, God is the one who created the institution of marriage (Genesis 2). He also uses marriage as an analogy between Jesus and His Church (Ephesians 5). In this case, marriage, my marriage, should reflect His Love and His Glory.

When it comes to marriage, there are generally two groups of people. The first group is the cynical group. This often portrayed by the media that once you are married, your life is over. Perhaps this is also related to some of the heartaches we have seen when marriages didn’t work. Then, divorce takes place and families are broken. Maybe this is why we are cynical. It is a very personal and painful subject that we need a defense mechanism for. On the other end of the spectrum, we have this fairy tale belief that once you have found your partner, it will be happily ever after. There will be no more heartache.Perhaps, we also sold ourselves into the ideas projected from movies.

I believe that both views of marriage are incorrect. Marriage is neither a living hell nor a heavenly paradise. The truth is Wai Jia is not perfect (though she is great in many aspects!) and neither am I. We both have our strengths and our weaknesses. We both have our differences. We have our own struggles and our own aspirations. When two driven individuals who grew up in opposite ends of the world come together, there is bound to be conflict from these differences. Because of the commitment we promisedeach other through marriage, we aim to encourage and build each other up, not tear each other down.

Many missionaries told me that when you are out on the mission field, all the sins which you thought you had dealt with will rise to the surface very quickly. I see that in myself. I thought there were areas in my life which I thought I had dealt with. The marriage helped me expose areas where I needed to work on. I honestly believe that conflicts within marriages are usually not the other person’s fault. They are mirrors of the sinful nature which I need to put away. The fleshly part within meneeds to die (and die QUICKLY!).

This is hard work. It is hard work because not many of us want to talk about it. This is one of the differences between dating and marriage. When Wai Jia and I date, we just want to have fun: go to a nice dinner orwatch a movie. Sure, we pray and read the Bible together but it is nothing like the intensity of living with someone on a day-to-day basis.

When I sin, she bears the consequences. There are some sinful actions or words I wished I didn’t do or say to hurt Wai Jia. She, in her very forgiving and loving nature, doesn’t give up on me or ridicule me. Rather, we talk about it. We pray against it. We accept each other. We try to help each other grow.

Whenever I read about Paul’s passage that we have to be worthy to live out the calling of being God’s children,, these words become reality when I grapple with my sinful self.  In Colossians 3, Paul says we have to put our old selves to death, while in Ephesians 4, he says we are to lay our old selves down and put on our new selves. Wow.

As I look back, some of the best things thathappened to our marriage were in the preparation stages before being together in marriage. The Marriage Preparation Course taught us the “Speaker-Listener technique” to work through our differences. It really helped us invest in building a foundation for our marriage. For me, to be one with Wai Jia is far more important than the logistics of a marriage (getting the house, what type of furniture to get etc.) Stuff comes and goes. They are important but they are not the most important. Investing in ourselves and in each other, building each other up, loving each other are far more important.

I hope I can still say the same thing a year, five years, ten years, and twenty years from now.

Following Jesus to Smokey Mountain

This is how wikipedia describes Smokey Mountain:

Smokey Mountain is the term coined for a large landfill located in Manila, Philippines. The area was cleared decades ago and became the site of numerous public housings for the impoverished people living in the slums surrounding the landfill. The slums were also cleared, which was the home of 30,000 people that make their living from picking through the landfill's rubbish.

A CNN report wrote an article about her experience at Smokey Mountain:

It's this looming mass of decomposed rubbish, standing more than 20 meters high. From a distance it looks like an enormous mound of Earth, almost of equal height to the towers that stand next to it, but on closer inspection you can see the layers of plastic bags, tires and bottles all squashed together -- the remains of 50 years of Manila's trash.

A few weeks ago, Wai Jia had a sudden burden for Smokey Mountain.  She visited there a few years ago with a friend.  The same friend is now serving there full time.  She received news that the kids had very yellow eyes and not sure what's the illness (or the cause).  I felt this is like the Macedonia calling.  We've been discussing and wondering what we can do.  Yet where we like to help, the doors were closed.

It was a Sunday afternoon.  We sat and we prayed for Smokey.   We didn't know what to do and we just told God that we are available and like to help.  He just had to open doors for us.

A few doors were open.  Wai Jia was able to get leave in last minute notice.  I was able to get our tickets online.   Just last night, a doctor gave us a bunch of multivatimins for the kids.

Since we got married and the past few months, I've been re-discovering what it means to follow Jesus.  What it means to depend solely on Him. I was medidating on a verse in Genesis 18 when God appeared before Moses and Sarah.  God told them they would have a child next year.  Sarah didn't believed it.  In return, God said...

Is anything too hard for the Lord? (Genesis 18:14)

Jesus is drawing me once again.  To follow Him.  Just as He called the disciples. Peter, John, Matthew.  Just follow Him.  Not to worry about what to eat or what to wear.  Not to worry about money or other things.  Follow Him.

Living in Singapore, there's a tendency for me to become complacent.  Wai Jia and I spent a lot of discussing and praying where God will take us.  When will we 'help' the poor.   How do we love our neighbours who live below the poverty line?

Going to Smokey Mountain we don't know what God will show us next.  We are ready to be use by Him.  We are ready to follow Him.  We are ready to give stuff up (they are a blessing from Him, anyways).

And so here we go.  Tomorrow afternoon.  Wai Jia.  Me.  A suitcase fill with mutlivitmains that will last for two months or so.  We don't know what God will do.  But what we pray for is for Christ to show up in the darkness.  We pray for His Spiriti to work through us to show His Glory in the midst of poverty.  We pray for Him to work in our hearts.  More compassion.  More mercy.  More grace.

Let's focus on the weightier matter of the law...justice, mercy and faithfulness.  To spend on behalf of the afficted.  To share the Good News of Jesus Christ.  To love our neighbours as ourselves.

Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cumin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness.  (Matthew 23:23)

and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry

    and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,

then your light will rise in the darkness,

    and your night will become like the noonday.

(Isaiah 58:10)

Wai Jia wrote a post about this experience.  You can read it here.

Lighten Your Load

A vivid dream from last night...

I was in my highschool and I was cleaning up my locker.  The locker was shared with someone else.  While I was going which things I needed to pack, I noticed there were a large amount of Singaporean dollars.  Since we were in Canada and my locker partner had no use of Singapore dollars, I took it with me.  I put all my things in my bag.  I had a race tomorrow and the weather would be cold.  I was figuring out what type of running gears I should wear.  Should I wear a short sleeve technical shirt with a long sleeve over?  I was trying on a piece of clothing but it was too tight! 

The school bus was leaving in a few minutes.  But my bag was too heavy for me to get to the school bus on time.  My alternative was taking public transport. It was would take a long time to get back home....

...and then I woke up.

This morning as I was praying for God to discern this dream, three words popped in my head.

Lighten

Your

Load

...last night, my wife was praying for me that she felt I was carried expectations from others on my shoulders. I needed to let go and focus on seeking God's approval instead.

And so now with more prayer to seek Him.  And to find ways to lighten my load.

Missing Home

Sometimes you don't realize how much you miss home until you receive an invitation to your best friend's wedding.  As you look through the wedding website and see who is the best man and groomsmen, you can't help to feel you should be there....

....perhaps this is what real friends are.  You want to be there to celebrate the good times and reflect on the memories you shared along the way.  Playing paintball.  Going through University together.  Countless ski trips.

So here's to my close friend's and his special someone tying the knot in May.  Wish I can be there...but I won't be back until June.

:)

Prayer and desire to be independent...

I will be honest. I am horrible at praying.  Especially to pray for a long time.

My mind always drift off.  I sometimes fall asleep praying.  Sometimes I am too busy to pray.

Actually there are many times I am too busy to pray.

But since the beginning of this year, I am tired of not having a prayerful life.

I remember sitting in the Bible School class in Cambodia last year.  The Missionary teacher was teaching.  He taught about the characteristics of a God's worker.  When he mentioned praying he said with disgust how some called themselves pastors when they don't even pray.

In today's age, we tend to love to read about new ways of doing church and creative things we can do to draw people to Christ.  The idea of relevance, the thoughts of missional and the buzzwords of contextualization are very common in today's Christian circle. (They are not necessary wrong..but I will save that for another post!)

What I seem to forget is that a God's worker is one sent by God, filled with the Holy Spirit, to do the will of God.  God is the one who commission the worker to go out (just as Moses and the Burning Bush).  He is the one who equip us.  He is the one who lead us.  He is the one who guide us.

I am ever impress by how the biographies of all the missionaries I read.  The commonality between them is their huge focus in prayer.  I am currently reading an autobiography by George Mueller.  His whole ministry, opening orphanages and Bible schools, were all dependent on prayers.  He wanted the world to see that God is the one who can be trusted and does provide so he made it a rule to never solicit funds.  

There's a portion of his book where he said how refreshing his day would be if he pray an hour before breakfast.  This week, Wai Jia and I made a habit to get up and pray before we do anything else. I will be hoenst, it is hard hard work. I can barely pray for 15 minutes.  George Muller also wrote that he would pray to God to give him the strength to get up the next day to pray.  Wow.  I never thought of that and applied to my own walk as well.

I often wonder why we don't pray as much as we should.  We hear many sermons.  Pray more. Pray more.  Before my excuse is that I am too busy since I made a commitment to meet a friend to go out.  I need to honor that.  Lately, I just chuck that excuse out the window.  How can I not honor God and give Him my best time?   Plus, I need Him to sustain my His ministry.  

And sometimes I think I enjoy being independent.  Just as a kid growing up, saving enough money to buy his own car.  Now he doesn't need to borrow his parents' car anymore.  He's a man now.  All grown up.  Sometimes I think the independent thinking flows into my own spiritual walk.  How silly to say, I don't need prayer nor need God to do His work.......BUT if I don't pray, that's what I am saying unconsciously.

Lastly, among the Christian circles, we have pastors that we like because of their skillful way to articulate the gospel.  We desire those skills.  Maybe it is the way they speak.  Or how intellectual they sound.  Or the way they get to the heart of the issue.  So we eye those skills instead of seeking the source of those skills, the Holy Spirit.

And so, where do I want others to see me.  Skillful way to deliver a sermon or one uninteresting person powered by the Holy Spirit.  Definitely the latter.  Thus, here we go, 2013.  This will be one of the point in my life where I draw closer to Him.

Charles Chambers often says that the greatest hindrance to God's work is when we think we can do something for the Lord.  It is when we realize we cannot do a thing for Him.  We are empty handed and hopeless.  Then He begins to work in us....

Amen and AMEN!

Doing the works of the Lord and being the works of the Lord

This morning I was reading the autobiography of George Mueller.  One of the early lessons in his walk with the Lord is that he would rely on the Holy Spirit to guide him on what to preach.  He reasoned that since he didn't know the need of the congregation but the Lord knew the hearts of every men and women in the congregation, he would solely rely on him.

The evening service I just attended was preached by a very powerful female speaker.  She spoke the Truth with authority and with clarity.  It was very refreshing.  

After listening to many sermons, you can tell those who are doing the works of the Lord and those who ARE the works of the Lord.

The former relies on individual skills and characters. The latter depends on the Holy Spirit.

The latter not only does the work but are transformed totally by the Lord.  They speak spiritual Truths as if they are prophets in the Old Testaments.  Their message is fill with conviction.  You can fill His presence in the atmosphere.  

The former has a good message.  The latter draws people to the point of conviction of sin and repentance.

Last week, I re-read the book of Acts.  The most striking is after being filled by the Spirit.  The Christians are not just smarter but they've gain such Spiritual wisdom that they outspoken those who try to refute them (Acts 6:10, Acts 18:28).

For my own walk, I would rather be the works of the Lord.  Be transformed by the Holy Spirit.  Then mere man doing the works of the Lord.  I can work hard and might get some recognition.  But the man (or woman) who is transformed by the Holy Spirit, their lives are never the same and the glory belongs to Him!