Nuts!

This story has nothing related to my post...but since this is my blog, I get to write what I want :)..I thought this is quite a serious and funny story to share.

In World War Two, one of the biggest battle fought was the Battle of Bastogne. It was in December 1944 when Germany launch one of their last counter attack against the Allies. The German Army encircled a number of paratroopers (the 101st US Airborne) in a town called Bastogne. The German officers asked the trapped soldiers to surrender.

The German Commander received this reply:

To the German Commander, NUTS!, The American Commander

Hehe.  The Germans had no idea what he meant.

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I was sharing with a sister earlier this week that I think sometimes I think I am nuts.  Can't everyone see it?  Can't anyone understand?  To give up one's life??!?!?

For example, let's take the idea of voluntarily selling everything they have to join Him....and as crazy as that sounds, it is also very intriguing and attractive. Sure, I had discussion about it.  What would you do if you have to sell everything and follow Christ?  Would you do it?

Sure.  We will say yes. I know I would.  When I seriously thinking of doing so, I can feel a mix of emotions.  Wow, it is hard to let go.  And to let go require the changing of one's heart.  And it is only the Lord that can change one's heart.

A while back I was asking God, 'God, how come my pay is so little? I had been working for so long.  Shouldn't I deserve a higher paying job so I can be more independent?'

More independent...less reliance from God??  Ha.

After understanding it was God's provision at work and how He provided me throughout the years.  I had an ever lasting God with so much love and compassion. Why would I go anywhere else???

I stopped asking that question. (Matthew 6:25...do not worry what you eat or drink).

This is where the rubber meets the road. To be honest, I don't think most of my friends understand (and that's ok...b/c sometimes I don't think I understand).

I had been asking for God to give away my tri-bike.  This is like my prize asset.  All my friends know I love the bike and sometimes they tease me that I treat the bike like a real person..hehe

If it is something I cherish so much, why am I asking for God to take it away?  I know it doesn't make logical sense.  I can't really explain it.

I feel like I need to be free of everything and seek His Kingdom and His Righteousness.  This ain't some monk like attitude where I live off the land and so on.  But rather, I wanted to strengthen my faith and rely on Him to provide.

When I see how the Lord provides, it is very 'illogical'.   The stories of Moses, Abraham, Joseph, Jacob, Gideon, Samson, David, Samuel, Jonah.the lists goes on and on.  None of their life is very logical.

Who would give birth when they are old in age? (Moses and Sarah)
Who would send 300 people against an army big as the sands in the dessert? (Gideon)
Who would be anointed as King and spend the majority of his life being hunted like a fugitive? (David)

So I say....yup I think I am nuts sometimes.

My previous pastor was from Philippines.  He once shared with us the story of how he went to England to get his Ph D.  He told us that he had to take a risk.  It was a step of faith.  Biblical Faith.  He and his wife sold everything and they didn't have enough money to live in England.  At the airport, the official asked them how would they live with so little money.  To which he replied, 'by faith'.  The official laughed, stamped their passport and let them pass.

When they arrived and went to school, he applied for this grant.  The application he wrote was horrible.  Even his wife didn't understand what he was writing.  Yet, by faith, he received the grant among many entries.  God is at work...

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And so here I am.  The longing for such faith.  The refining of my life to be a witness to receive such faith.  And sometimes if I am nuts and I don't make sense...it is ok.  He always provides.

The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!" (Luke 17:5)

Notice that the apostles said it to the Lord.  They understood that only Jesus can increase their faith.  Or in a way, they realize they cannot do this on their own.....and I know I cannot do it on my own....