Priorities in a Christ-Centered Relationship

If you are a regular to Church, or perhaps you are part of a fellowship, you will often hear the message that we ought to put Christ first in our lives.

And sometimes we ask that ourselves, how am I doing that in my life?

And sometimes we think it is an impossible ideal.  What God ask for, to give up our lives, deny ourselves, sell our stuff and follow Him is impossible.  Worst, it is IMPRACTICAL.  Foolish thing to do.

And sometimes there's that tension.  I want to live for Christ.  But I got this to do next week.  I have to do that next month.  Well, in the end if I live a good life, take care of myself and do some good, then that will make me a good Christian.

And sometimes we choose to ignore that tension.  Yes, we should live our lives for Christ.  But I got this big project next week.  Or I have bills to pay.  And so we choose the our lives problems and focus on those first.

And sometimes we place our agendas as God's agendas.

And sometimes we give up our agendas and wait for His.

...

Agendas and priorities.

Perhaps that's what on my mind.  Where's my priority? Or more importantly, what's His Priority?

You need to get a ring.  You need to set a date.  You need to work out your finances.  You need to communicate..you need to...you need to....

I was joking with her as we were setting down a date.  Let it be October 13.  In Cantonese, the pronunciation of thirteen also means 'must give birth' or 'must live'.  It is considered to be a lucky number because it symbolize birth and life.

As I was thinking about this, I realized I had a bigger concern.  Where do God wants us to go? How the future will be like? What's the ministries we will be doing?  How will we support one another?

But really, the one question is where God wants us to go?

That should be the priority that override all the other priorities.

So we pray about this now. The date, though, it is important.  And it is inconvenience for those who want to come and not sure when is secondary. I do not have one.  I know we will get marry. It is not a matter of when but when is His timing.

The focus is to seek Him.  To put Him first.  Where does He wants us to go? Stay in Asia? Stay in Africa?

And though we might not know when we will get marry. We have much peace to know that He is in charge.

Mature

There’s a time when it must walk among the branches, looking over the height, over its surrounding.  It must flap its wings.  For a moment thinking whether they will hold itself in the air.  There might be a sense of fear, excitement and above all, unknown.

How will flight taste like?

I am not sure if birds think as human do.  Maybe it is part of their gene and wiring.  When it reaches a certain point, the bird must fly.  That’s what it is created for.

Last night I was listening to a sermon which struck me in the deepest way.  Part of the sermon, the speaker said that the more immature you are, the bigger the sign you need and seek.  After a while, God will stop answering your prayers and stop leading.  Because you will know God and His Will so closely that you will know what His Will is.

I can recall for the past few months, I hear very little from the Lord.  A lot of praying, seeking (and sometimes yelling) from my end.  But He’s been silent.

It is almost as if the Lord is telling me, ‘Cliff, you know My Ways and you know my Will.  You have done enough Bible study and seen me at work.  Now the ball is in your court, go do my Work.’

And the immature me continue to stay in the nest.  Seeking relentlessly for a sign and  confirmation.  Probably afraid to leave.  Afraid to go. Afraid to do. Continue to ask, ‘what should I do? Give me a sign.’

Coming to Singapore.  Being a missionary with OMF in the International Headquarters (IHQ).  Giving up everything.  Being in a relationship.

There are many changes in my life.  As much as I rather stop and stay still to seek comfort, 2012 will be a continue of seeking His Faith as my life continue to change.  And now, instead of trying to hang on to the past, the comfort of my old self, the desire to stay in the nest, it is time to move on, a new season has already come.

When I was a child, I spoke like a child.  I thought like a child.  I reasoned like a child.  When I became a man, I gave up my childish ways.  For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.  

1 Corinthians 13:11-12

It is time to leave the nest, look around and fly in the sky.

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A sign of Christian maturity is not waiting for God to tell us what to do. It is not merely seeing signs and visions.  It is in knowing God so intimately and His characters so well that our desire and His Will aligns, our body becoming the instrument of God.   Through us, feeble bodies and broken souls, bring fourth the Kingdom of God.

Thy Kingdom come.  Thy Will be dome.  On earth as it is in heaven.

2012, a new year

Going to do a quick blog post before I go to OMF morning prayer. 

There's a general feeling of reminisce at the end of a year. 

2011. 

What was I doing at the beginning of the year?

What happened?

What's going on now?
What did I miss?

What were the most memorable moments?

As often, looking back one year it feels like time went back really quickly and at the same time a lot of things had happened.

I went to Cambodia on a vision trip.

I am now part of Overseas Missionary Fellowship.  Serving as an Associate in the International Headquarters in Singapore (a missionary).

My liver markers were off the chart and for a while I thought I was dying.

I am now in a relationship.

I am also quite out of shape.  As in. I have a gut.  It's amazing how in a mere two years of inactivity, I lost a large amount of fitness.  Perhaps I should rename this blog as Christian Non-athlete.  

Though, a new year comes new goals, hopes and dreams.

Here's a few items which I want to focus on for this year and this season of my life....

i) To be a deeper Christian and not a broader Christian.  To dig deep in knowing God.  To be fervent in prayer.  

ii) To not stoop in the guilt of being out of shape (how could I done this) but rather live an active and healthy lifestyle.

iii) To once again dream on missions.  The freedom to choose to be Christ to those around me in whatever circumstances I am in.

iv) To freely let go and surrender all that I have, own and value.  

v) Focus on family.

I can foresee there are many changes in 2012.  There are many uncertainty as well.  Where will I go after OMF? This is a two year term.  Will I stay? Where will I be living? In Singapore? In Canada? 

Those questions are important questions indeed.  Though the utmost important question is where is He leading me? (And, of course, am I willing to follow Him?)

Here it goes...if 2011 is a sign of following Christ with all its ups and downs...2012 will be just like that...if not more so :O)

“Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.” At once they left their nets and followed him.

Matthew 4:19-20

Meaning of Marriage (Christian Context)

I was given a task to answer the question: what does marriage means to me?

Not that I given this topic much thought as I wasn't in a relationship or never really thought about marriage (or at least thought about it seriously).  I always find it fascinating that marriage was already define in second chapter of Genesis.  It is after the creation story and right after God create man and woman.  It is almost as a high priority in God's eyes to put marriage as a relationship between man and woman.

So here's my thoughts.  I thought it was rather Biblical (at least my interpretation of marriage). Of course I would and could share more and dig through other passages...but I was given a 500 word limit.

It's also interesting to note that it has little in similarity with the marriage we know as of today. With the wedding bells, the ceremony, the glitter and glamour of the event, focus on financial (car, house, living expenses etc.)....my definition is probably not the most romantic and probably won't sweep someone's off her feet.  But if it does attract someone, then she and I have something in common :O))

...

What does marriage mean to Cliff?

It is interesting to note that the author of Genesis put not only the origin of human in the beginning of the Bible, he also include marriage right after it.  In fact, if we take a look at the story of creation in Genesis 2, we can see that the story of creation and marriage is one story (Genesis 2:4-25). Right after God created woman by taking a rib from Adam, the man said:

“This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man” (Genesis 2:23 NASB).

The author then use verse 23 to explain why man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife to become one flesh (verse 24).

When I think about marriage and all that it contains; the wedding, bearing a family, living with one together, cry and laugh with one another, the purpose of marriage goes back to what Adam said.   There’s such closeness between husband and wife that they will be as close as to bones and flesh.

This is also the same description how Paul instructed the husbands in Ephesians 5:28-30.  The husband is to treat his wife as if she is his own body and flesh (like bones and flesh).  In NASB translation, he is to ‘nourish and cherishes’ (verse 29b) his wife, just as Christ does to the church.

When I read the passage about the roles of husband and wife in chapter 5 of Ephesians, specifically from verse 23 till the end of the chapter, Paul first instructed the husbands their role is to be “the head of his wife, as Christ also is the head of the church.”  Though the passage is talking about role of husband to take care of his wife, Paul is also interchangeably using the same analogy and one-ness of husband and wife to describe the Church and Christ.

The husband is the head of the wife (just as Christ is the head of the church).  Husband is to love his wife, just as Christ loves the church (verse 24).  Plus, the husband ought to sanctify her with the Word.  There’s an Old Testament sacrificial imagery from using water to cleanse and purify the wife and so to present the wife as no spot, or wrinkle and be holy and blameless (verse 27).

The role of the he husband is the spiritual leader in the household and in marriage.  He first has to know the Word so he can help his wife grows toward the Lord.  I heard from a friend’s wedding that the groom told in front of the congregation that it is his job to help his bride love God more than him.  This is as close as cleansing and sanctifying a husband can do.  The husband ought to help the wife loves Christ more than him.

Lastly, back to the Genesis 2, the reason why Eve was created was because Adam needs a suitable helper.  The purpose of the marriage is for the husband and wife to help and encourage one another.  They are to support one another in doing the Lord’s work.   Just as in Ephesian 5, the Lord lays His life for the church, that’s the sacrificial love that the husband ought to bear for his wife.

Signs of Spiritual Growth

- who preacher help me grow the most?
- I have no one to connect with in this fellowship, I am outta here.
- who can I talk to when I need help?
- who can pray for me and listen to my needs?
- I can only worship with these songs
- that sermon is so boring, what a waste of time
- God is not here.  This is too hard.  I am not ready. God is gone and so am I (during the difficult times)
- This is not my fault. This is his fault. God, you see how I am hurting.  This is unfair!

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- how is this church experience help the congregation to grow?
- how is the fellowship help those who are in need of help? How can I contribute to these fellowship? How can I learn from the brothers and sisters indifferent of me?
- who needs help and how I can help them?
- how is this worship song bring me closer to God even if I don't find them fun to listen to...
- that sermon is so boring, what can I learn from this sermon...
- where's God in all of this. How can I learn about God's Grace, Mercy and build up my faith through these trials. I do not want to stay but I know this is the right thing to do. (during the difficult times)
- there's a problem here.  I might be wrong. I am hurt. But I will try and restore and reconcile.

Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. 18 Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.”

John 21:18

Christianity is not about you

A while ago...

I told a Christian brother that following Jesus is not about him...

...there was a moment of silent and the conversation went somewhere else.  Looking back, I think I sounded quite snobby and disrespectful.

Yesterday I came across a blog post that made me reflected what I said a while ago.

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.

Even in that last phrase “keep oneself unstained from the world”, he’s not talking about monastic retreat, private meditation, or even personal piety. The contextual implication there  involves the need to “wash our hands of worldliness” which, throughout the book of James, is defined as self-absorption–a “my life for me” approach to life in contrast from a “my life for you” approach to life. Worldliness then, according to James, is me thinking always about me (see James 4:1-3).

Perhaps next time I should explain that our spiritual growth is not by our individual and often private knowledge of who God is.  Rather it is always done in the context of relationship, fellowship and community.

And this makes a lot of sense when Jesus say anyone who follows Him must carry their own cross and we are to love our neighbors as ourselves.

It makes me wonder....sometimes we ask each other..how's your spiritual walk...and the conversation often goes back to..'oh I need to pray more..I need to read the Bible..I need to attend a conference to know more about God.' These are all good things. At the same time, I wonder is that 'spiritual' if I focus more on my prayer life and fail to see my neighbors in need of help? (Hmm...parable of Good Samaritan anyone?)

It becomes a self center focus.  How's my relationship with God?  Does it sound strange to consider that my relationship with God is not really about me? But Him?  And at my neighbors?

I wonder how do I live up to consider myself last and others first in a culture where I put myself first.  To be honest, the world, I am pretty sure is all about putting yourself ahead of everyone else. After all, no one is going to take care of you.  You better learn how to live on your own.  Hehe, how different does the gospel brings.  God, is our Heavenly Father who takes care of you.

Real spirituality is forgetting about yourself, washing your hands of you.- Tullian Tchivdjian

Questions, Thinking, Sunday School Answers

This post is probably a bit of rambling from what I experience tonight and my own walk as a Christian.

Tonight, a friend and I had a discussion about how to pray and what's the best way to pray. It was a wonderful discussion about God, dating, seeking His Will, temptation and everything in between.

At one point, I asked my friend a few questions...

- how come we have to pray when God already know what we want?
- do you really think God will not answer you if you don't pray 'rightly'? Side Question: What's the right way to pray anyway?

The conversation was through the drive on the way back home from downtown.  As I pulled on my friend's driveway, I told him the fact is all the answers to these questions are Sunday School answers.  He knew them already.   At that point, he realized that it was all in his head.  It's just a matter of linking his life to what he believed in.

...

One of Ravi Zacharias' ministries is known as Let My People Think. Sometimes Christians are great at having the answer. Not just only the answer but the right one.  Especially those we consider as Sunday School answers.  But we never really give too much thought to them.

It is a discouragement moment when during a discussion, say in Sunday School when someone answer God is Sovereign or Jesus died on the cross for us and you can see the audience roll over their eyes or stare blankly (I will admit, sometimes I am guilty of that as well).

Tonight, all the answers I gave to my friend were these 'Sunday School answers'.  When my friend realized he already knew them, he said, "wow, I never realize these Sunday School answers have so much depth to it."

What got both of us excited tonight not because these answers were new, tt was the questions I posed for us to dig around.

I think the question is way more important than the answer..haha.yes..I am sure many have taken from Matrix scene when Trinity told Neo that it is the question that drive us.  It is true, at least in my experience, questions drive me to understand more about why we pray.  Someone once said it is taking ownership of the answer.

The question drives the thinking process.  Not the answers.  Truly, the answers are important.  In today's information age, I can practically find all the answers online about Biblical truth, character and everything in between.

For those who teach at Sunday School, the question goes back to how...how can we make others to think of these questions?  I think that's the work of the Holy Spirit.  Holy Spirit tugs someone's heart to seek God.  It is the Father who calls us to Him, not one day we decided to get up and learn more about God.  It is all His being, His calling and His mission.

I am not smart enough to think of the best method of teaching.  If I am teaching Sunday School, I probably just pull out a lesson and just go through it (which I do).  I do know though,  school, or academic learning is not the best method of learning.  By this, I mean where one person just spills loads of answers or facts to a mass audience.  Perhaps this is all individual basis.  It is when the person is will to learn, that becomes important.  Perhaps this is why they say it is not about the teacher and it is all about the students.

Something for me to grasp tonight is to recognize when someone is being tugged by the Spirit, direct them with questions and explain with answers.  Thinking is indeed more powerful than merely handing out spoonful of answers.  And a question, is a good way to start the thinking and the seeking process.

How do you see your work fitting into faith?

A friend asked me where do I see my work and my faith.  How do they interwine?  Here's my response.....

You are asking a loaded question...one that I can spend forever to answer :)...(which I probably will and expect this to be a long email).

The biggest lesson I learn from triathlon is the order of things when it comes to serving God.  I learn to let go of the expectations, dreams and accomplishments first, commit to the Lord, then work hard.

Often we do it the other way.  We try and work hard first, then we ask God to make things happen to meet our expectations.  

If we are truly His follower and His servant, we should let Him lead and we should follow.  

And this takes a lot of courage, guts and faith.  This is almost like you not worry about MBA program and asks God if He wants you to go somewhere, you will do it without hesitation or regret.  

Side note:  To make sure I was getting rid of my idols...I told God during the summer I will give my tri bike to anyone in my vicinity if they need it.  Triathlon is almost my pride and joy.  I have to make sure it ain't my idol by making sure I can give it up.  It's God's bike anyways.  At the same time I stop doing triathlon this summer.  I just want to see where God is at.  If He wants me to do it, I am sure He will let me know. [God didn't give me that opportunity and I still kept my tri bike.]

I ain't very spiritual or some holy person.  What I notice is that Jesus asks us to count the cost first then follow Him.  Instantly, I think by following Him I will miss something fun or miss out on life.   Granted I sometimes feel that too.  Like this morning, I have to remind myself does it make sense to give up money that can be spent for retirement or a house or a car to help the poor.  Then I remember what Jesus said.....Matthew 6:33.  Seek His Kingdom first.   Then everything else I do make sense.  Even if it doesn't make sense to this world. It makes sense from the Bible.

Funny thing is that those who truly see (or seek) the value of the Kingdom, they are more than willing to give up everything.  Because it is so good.  Much more than what this world can offer.  This explains why the 11 of the 12 disciples died for Christ after resurrection.  Also explain why Jesus said the Kingdom is like the treasure hidden in a field and fine pearls (Matthew 13:44-46).  They find it great value that they will literally sell everything and follow.

The reality, and a griming reality, is that this is how most of us live our lives.  We put job, family and lifestyle first.  Go to a good program to get a good job to get a good house for our family.  Then we look for a church/fellowship that meet our needs and with the time we have left we spent on ministry and serving.

So our priorities look like this:

Lifestyle -> Job -> Family Home -> Church -> Ministry

In fact, Jesus teaches us to focus on the opposite.

Ministry -> Church -> Family Home -> Job -> Lifestyle

[Added: This is taken from Tim Chester's The Busy Christian's Guide to Busyness]
[Correction: I mistakenly wrote family.  It should be home.]

Ministry and church comes first.  Granted ministry doesn't just mean in the church. It means any activities (in the church and out of the church) that use to serve Him, share the Gospel (Great Commission) and encourage other brothers and sisters.  

In North America, we strive for a comfortable life.  The good life can become a thing more important that following Him. Perhaps this is why the Rich Young Ruler is so hard to follow Christ.  Because letting go is just too hard.   I think we live in a culture where it is more harder to give up than just work hard.  I mean like this, how often will a Christians give up their lifestyle to serve the Lord.  Instead, we tend to be, well I will just serve the Lord harder. I will do more for Him. I will do this this and that in the church...fellowship...programs.  

So coming back to this, what about my job? The way I see it, the job is just a ministry given to me as much as anything else. Everything we do (in and out of church) should give glory to God.  I don't have a secular life and spiritual life.  Everything is sacred.  

I still do what I do and I work hard for my company.  That's good work ethics and good witness.  My job ain't my idol and if God calls me to go somewhere else I will drop it and go.  The first thing I have to do is acknowledge that God will take care of me, not my job/career/accomplishments.  He is the Father that provides for sparrows,  He can take care of me (trust me, I still struggle w/ this).

At the end of the day, God doesn't need us to do anything.  He is God.  His Spirit is leading.  The Kingdom can grow with and without us.  We are fortunate to be chosen by Him to do Good Works which He set us out to do for His Glory.  I just follow Him as hard as I can.  Remember what Paul said in 2 Timothy 4:7 -> I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 

We need Christians in business world just as much we need missionaries.  Christians can be just as impact-ful in the secular world as anywhere else.  We are called to do good.   To do good to our neighbors.  And we should do it to everyone around us.  The faith is whether we are willing to do it by His ways instead of our way.

Tonight, I had the pleasure of spending a night with a highschool friend. We went downtown and shared a coffee with a homeless person.  We visited him a few times now. It didn't seem much. I mean, we didn't change life or performed some miracles.  But yet, this little thing, discipling my friend, serving together, and seeking the Kingdom is wonderful.  I will never give this up for anything else.  It just feel so good.  Though the world might never understand..it's ok :).  I am serving to the One that matters.

I find that following Christ....the more I follow, the more I realize i need more faith.  And the more faith I need, the more I want to follow.  At first, I just want to try giving up a bit of this and a bit of that.  Next thing I know, I am starting to give up more and more.....then the only thing that's left is my life.  And we know that my life ain't really mine anyways.  And this ain't just me figuring this out, it is all the work of the Holy Spirit.  And that's super awesome :)

I will pray for you.  There must be immense pressure.  May He reveal you and guide you as you finish your schooling.

Forgiving others

This week, my church is having Vacation Bible School (VBS).

The children pastor last night shared in Prayer meeting about some of the difficult kids that she had to work with.  She had great wisdom.  She already expect some kids would be trouble makers.

There were two kids who often get into fights.  She spoke to each of them.  Later the day, one of the kids went to the pastor afterward and told her that the other kid was fighting him.  The pastor asked him what did he do.  He told her he did nothing.  Instead he told the teacher to tell the other kid to 'not fight him'.

The children pastor later saw the two kids playing together.

....

It's funny how children can forgive so easily.   And yet as we grow up, we tend to hold grudges faster than we forgive.

Is it because of all the pain and suffer that lead us to harden our hearts?  To protect ourselves so we don't get hurt again?  To build a wall (and towers, and a moat, with dragons and monsters guarding....)

Or is there a part of us, much deeper and darker that we enjoy secretly seeing the demise of others as our own enjoyment.  Especially those who wrong us and 'rip' us off.

Quickly, it reminded me from a Tim Keller's sermon on forgiveness....

'this is how the world is like..you stand on your porch and they stand on theirs.  They cut you up and so you slice up a  piece of them.'

That's how the world works...

Source (http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/csl0138l.jpg)

You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself." If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.

So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.

The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery, idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.  Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

Galatians 5:13-26

...

More thoughts.

It is so hard to ask people to forgive one another.  Even Christians.  Especially Christians.  Perhaps we have lost sight that God forgive us first.  We feel like we deserve our statues and our rights.  He took away our debts.  We might sing it on Sun.  Read it in the Bible.  Do a devotion on it.

To live it.  When we encourage one another to do it, I find a lot of blank stares.  

• Well, this case is different....
• Jesus didn't really mean....
• What about God's truth and love for justice...
• You can't do that.  What if he did it again...
• We can't let this go...
• This is so unfair to us...

To dig deep and have the courage and faith to let things go.  It's tough.  

When I read Dietrich Bonhoeffer's quote on community....

I can no longer condemn or hate other Christians for whom I pray, no matter how much trouble they cause me..

...it is so encouraging.

A Christian community is like a family.  He is my brother or she is my sister. We are all adopted.  No matter how much they wrong us, they are still family. As Dietrich said, no matter how much trouble they cause me.

Even if they are not Christians, we are God's ambassadors to them.

..hehe I guess when Jesus says to love our enemies (Matthew 5), He really means it.

After all, Jesus did died for His enemies (Romans 5).

Hmm..I should remind myself..if I wrong someone I need to go and ask for forgiveness and I need to reconcile differences....

...

VBS is going well in my church.  150 kids.  I look forward on Sun when they will present to the parents and to the congregation. AMEN!

Repost: Casual vs Captive

Taken from a friend's blog:

George Barna in The Seven Faith Tribes: Who They Are, What They Believe, and Why They Matter

Casual Christianity is faith in moderation. This particular tribe is comprised of significant proportions of minimally active born again Christians and moderately active but theologically nominal Christians. It allows them to feel religious without having to prioritize their faith. It fulfills their inner need to have some type of connection with a deity, and provides the image of being a decent, faith-friendly person. Christianity is a low-risk, predictable proposition for this tribe, providing a faith perspective that is not demanding. A Casual Christian can be all the things that they esteem: a nice human being, a family person, religious, an exemplary citizen, a reliable employee – and never have to publicly defend or represent difficult moral or social positions or even lose much sleep over their private choices as long as they mean well and generally do their best. Casual Christianity, because of its moral receptivity and pliability, generally eliminates spiritual backbone from moral discussions. To them, Casual Christianity is the best of all worlds; it encourages them to be a better person than if they had been irreligious, yet it is not a faith into which they feel compelled to heavily invest themselves.

The lives of Captive Christians are defined by their faith; their worldview is built around their core spiritual beliefs and resultant values. Casual Christians are defined by the desire to please God, family, and other people while extracting as much enjoyment and comfort from the world as possible. The big difference between these two tribes is how they define a successful life. For Captives, success is obedience to God, as demonstrated by consistently serving Christ and carrying out His commands and principles. For Casuals, success is balancing everything just right so that they are able to maximize their opportunities and joys in life without undermining their perceived relationship with God and others. Stated differently, Casuals are about moderation in all things while Captives are about extreme devotion to their God regardless of the worldly consequences.”

Christian Growth

Christian growth doesn’t happen by working hard to get something you don’t have. Christian growth happens by working hard to live in the reality of what you do have. - Tullian Tchividjian

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tullian/2010/05/19/growth-by-remembering-2/

Will give more thoughts on this later tonight.

A Creative God at play

D is a 70 yr old man that live in Mississauga. He is a competitive rower and since I am a triathlete, we have a lot in common in regards to racing and competition.

D is unemployed, struggling to pay bills and has family problems as well.

Through the years of hanging out with him, it is cool to see God working in his life. I remembered him asking me who Christians are how they are diff than Catholics. He frequents a fellowship at a Baptist church. One of his students invited him to go to a church. So God is working. No question about that.

I had been taking courses at Mac Div on a part time basis. I have to write papers and my grammar is horrible (you can tell by my posts :DDD). D use to be an English teacher, I asked him to proof read my papers. I paid D for it. Afterall, work is work.

While having pho tonight and chatting about some of his life problems, it dawned on me at how creative God is working among all this.

Look at the situation. He needed money and do not know God. I needed someone to edit my grammar ridden errors papers for seminary. I was given the opportunity to connect two and two together.

Now he get some money (for work, no charity case here) and my paper is a witness to who God is. I prayed that God can use this process to work on D's heart.

D added this in my paper:

Your experiences are gratifying I would think now you can put all this to future use in helping others, something you do well at and I'm sure will excel at in the future.

Your friend D

Thanx 4 being a part of my life

...

This is an example of a Creative God at play. I never planned this from the beginning. God worked through me without realizing it. Is ok. I am just a tool anyways. I was merely a spectator caught at the glimpse of a God not only going after the lost but also provide an avenue to reduce poverty. Praise the LORD!

D told me he had been reading about Hannah and the birth of Samuel...awesome!! :)

Anger!

Google Reader today pull out a post made by Tullian a while back. The post is the difference between God-Centered anger and Self-Centered anger.

A definitely good read.

The world so often senses our anger — but do they ever sense our grief? They think we’re angry simply because we’re not getting our way, but I’m afraid they don’t feel our sorrow over sin’s negative, de-humanizing effects. Our anger is not communicated in a “You were made for so much more than this” type manner. They hear our anger without grief and conclude, “They’re not angry because they want what’s best for us; they’re angry because they only want what’s best for them and they’re not getting it.” No wonder they tune us out.

When we see the restlessness and wreckage in people’s lives because they’re not in relationship with God and they’re living sin-filled lives, it should stoke our anger — an anger that arises because we love them and grieve to see them living for something so destructive when God created them to live for something beautiful and satisfying.

Self-centered anger is not a grieving, love-fueled anger; God-centered anger is. So does your anger rage because your love for God and your love for others is radical? When people see us hating what God hates because our love for God and people is real and deep, then and only then will they pay attention to our message.

I admit, there are those times when I know my rage is self centered. The worst is not because it is self-centered. The worst is I justify it that I do it for God. What a hypocrite!

The Living God that Speaks

Of all the miracles that happen upon my life, there is none more vivid than when the Lord spoke to me.

Looking back, I often don't think this was important.

Lately, I've been reflecting these experiences and compared them with the Bible. Moses and the Burning Bush (Exodus 3:4) :

When the LORD saw that he had gone over to look, God called to him from within the bush, "Moses! Moses!"

And Moses said, "Here I am."

...and Saul on the way to Damascus (Acts 9:4-6):

He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?"

"Who are you, Lord?" Saul asked.

"I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting," he replied. "Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do."

Though no one has asked me how do I know it was Jesus who speak. I just know. I wish I can describe how His voice is like. I can't really.

The first time was in 2005. I had bike accident and a few teeth came off (ouch!). A few days later reality hit me. I cried for the Lord for help. I never prayed so hard. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know if this could be fixed. Would I be toothless forever? How much would it cost? I was barely making anything.

One of my front teeth that came off.  The quarter beside it is to show how long the tooth was.

I could feel a hand on my shoulder and a voice said, 'don't worry. Everything will be alright. Just trust me.'

.....

A few years later, it was 2007 July and I was doing my first Ironman (3.8 k swim/180 k bike and 42 k run). Before you crossed the finish line, you had to run out for a 2 km loop. We started at 7 am in the morning. By then, it was dark. I had been racing for 14 hrs. I was tired :). I kept moving. As I was running to the finish line, all the memories leading up to the race flooded over me.

I remembered my bike accident and the feeling of helplessness. To learn how to swim. To learn how to train. To learn how to do everything. Not knowing if I have enough money to put into training. Using second hand equipments  (my bike and my tri suit). Liver transplant. Doubting whether I can do this. It was at the same time I had relationship trouble. I quit my job. The fellowship I was leading was on the verge of splitting. The whole bit. It was uphill climb the whole way.

I was giving thanks to God when Jesus revealed more of my past. He showed me those times when I loved to get drunk in university, passing out at friend's house, puking my guts out. He showed me all those moments. Then He told me, "see all these, I was there with you the whole time."

By then, tears were coming out. Good thing it was a dark road leading back to the finish line :DDD. I couldn't help but to give thanks to Jesus. He was there. I didn't know it. He was there the whole time. Yet He didn't let me go. He just waited for me.

I wonder why I don't share this more often. I think I should. Is it too hard to believe that the God speaks in the Bible can also speak now? Isn't He still the living God? Isn't He still goes recklessly after sinners to bring them back to Him? I think so.

I wonder if Paul (also known as Saul) ever wondered why Jesus called him out when he was near Damascus. I wonder why Jesus spoke to me when I was in the middle of a race. Though, just like Moses and Saul, once someone heard the Lord, their heart are transformed. They never go back. Looking from 2007 till now, I wouldn't go back either.

When Cliff encountered Jesus at the end of his Ironman race.

The Deceitful Heart

Last night I got a text message from a friend. He wanted to talk. Uh oh. When a guy text another guy he wanna talk, it is either very good news or not so good news.

So we decided to chat over a pint of beer. As he shared about some of the struggles he had, I could not help but to share mine.

I told him God had impressed me through the past few months to go and reconciled with relationships that I wronged. Impress might be not the right word. It was more of conviction. In a prayer for reconciliation, the Lord told me...'You want reconciliation between two groups?...Fine. But first why don't you go reconcile with those who you wrong?"

To be honest, deep inside, I know those whom I wronged. I know those who I should apologize.

Also to be honest, and the fact is I did not feel like apologizing at all. Not only do I chose not to do it, I found DELIGHT in not doing so.

I am right. They are wrong. I don't care. If it hurts them..even better.

And this is sin at its best (or worst).

If we take a look at the Laws. The ten commandments, it wasn't just the actions that were wrong. Yes, you shouldn't kill someone. You shouldn't steal. You shouldn't worship idols. But the worst part ain't the action. It is the motive behind the action. It is the joyful disobedience that God hates.

Through my own experience and reading through the Bible, I come to a conclusion that the heart is rebellious against God in nature.

We can see this all the way back in the Garden of Eden. When the serpent tempted Eve in Genesis 3, this was her response:

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. (Genesis 3:6)

Pleasing to the eye. How often is the sin in my life is also joyful in a sinister way. And this is what God hates the most.

My friend asked me, how did I came to this point. I told him, only the power of God can change someone's heart.

I was glad I could share this because we rarely talked about God.

I told him I was so full of self pride that even though I knew I was wrong, I chose to ignore it.

It ain't a big deal. No one really cares...

Only when God cracked my heart and showed me who my true self, I could do nothing but bowed down and go reconcile those who I wronged.

And that's the power of God. It had nothing to do with me. I was just a broken soul caught a glimpse of His Greatness. He just worked right through me.

I hope I will never forget this. That it is God at work through the whole process. And that I can bask and rejoice in His Glory. If He can redeem a rebellious soul like me, He is indeed sovereign, merciful, compassion, ever loving kindness. AMEN!!!

Personal Calling Statement

Last night, I went to a friend, also a missionary, session on Missions. One of the exercise is to develop a personal calling statement.

Like Paul wrote in Ephesian 2:10:

For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (NIV)

Here's mine (still a working progress):

For I, Cliff Tam, despite having a heart of a Pharisee, is redeemed and called by the Lord, to go after the lost of the lost in Mississauga.

Unity in Christ: Beyond race and nationality

Before Jesus was taken up to Heaven, He told the disciples the following:

But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth. (Acts 1:8)

The verse is an introduction for the book of Acts. The apostles shared Jesus in Jerusalem...then they went off to Judea and Samaria....then the book ends off in Rome. Which in their times it is the heart of the world.

We were studying this during Sunday School and Samaria caught my attention.

Samaria, in the eyes of Israel, is a dirty place with dirty people. Originally, Samaria was Israel, the Northern Kingdom in the Old Testament. Israel was invaded by the Assyrians. In order to keep the conquered nations from rebelling, Assyrians empire had a policy to export the local people out and also bring in other nationalities.

In Jesus times, Samaria was fond upon in the eyes of the Jews. The Samaritans are not pure blood Hebrews and not considered to be descendant of Abraham. Because of this, the Jews will not worship together with them. Samaritans were second class citizens.

In fact, to be called someone as a Samaritan was insulting. In John 8, the Jews accuse Jesus of:

Aren't we right in saying that you are a Samaritan and demon-possessed? (John 8:48)

Ouch!

When I think about Samaria, I thought of Jesus and the Samaritan lady at the well (John 4).

I thought about what the Samaritan lady said about worshipping:

Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem. (John 4:20)

AKA we, Samaritans, we worship here. You, Jews, worship there.

We see Jesus reply:

Believe me, woman, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth. (John 4:21-24)

I highlighted a few words that caught my eyes. From previous Bible Studies on this passage, Jesus is saying that it doesn't matter where you worship.

What I really want to focus is the racial relationship focus on this passage. Jesus started with talking about Samaritans and Jews. Then in the next verse He jumps into true worshipers. Who are the true worshipers? It is both. It is anyone, regardless of their background, heritage, gender, race, ethnicity.

When I re-read this passage, I got very excited.

When I look at the Old Testament and the New Testament, we see that God's master plan was to bring all nations...

To keep this post from going too long....you can look at

• Genesis 12:2 (Abram)
• Genesis 35:11 (Jacob)
• Matthew 28:18-20 (Great Commission)
• Phillipians 2:10 (every knee should bow) [that's really taken from Joel]
• Revelation 7:9 (every nation)

I go to a Chinese Church. Chinese have a few dialects. The majority is Mandarian and Cantonese. My church is divided into congregations based on English, Mandarian and Cantonese.

I wasn't raised in a Chinese Church. I only become a Christian five years ago. Speaking to a few brothers and sisters, there is a lot of negative connotation with being in a Chinese Church.

MAJOR NOTE: Please bear with me on this. This post is a reflection of what I see. I am not here to pick a fight or point fingers at who is at fault in this. I do realize that like any other human, I am limited by my own interpretation. I do not have all the facts and I am guilty on being bias and flawed. I am trying to relate what I read from the Bible, study the character of God (theology) and application.

And I also have the same frustration as well. I remember a while back telling a brother that if I ever go to another church I will never go to a Chinese church again.

I remember speaking to a sister about this. She grew up in a Chinese church and seen lots of things. She said that she would want to go to a church that is multi ethnicity.

That's true too.

I joked that some of us, Chinese Christians, like to worship with every other race out there...except our own.

Let's go back to the passage. Jesus say true worshippers will worship the Father in true and in spirit. He is telling the woman, some day you won't have to worship with just your race up in the mountains. You will be able to worship with the Jews (and all other group of people too).

So when is that day? When is the day that the true worshippers, regardless of where they are from, what language they speak, what culture they are from....can come together?

That day is already here..

We see that already happening in Acts 2, right after the Pentecost:

Now there were staying in Jerusalem God-fearing Jews from every nation under heaven. When they heard this sound, a crowd came together in bewilderment, because each one heard them speaking in his own language. (Acts 2:5-6)

And a bit afterwards:

Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day.

They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. (Acts 2:41-42)

So all Jews from every nation under heaven was accepted. And this continue on. In the Great Commission that we are to make disciples to all nations....

So why am I reflecting on this....well as a church with three different languages and culture. It is tough to manage together.

Among the differences of how different culture 'run' things. It doesn't matter. In fact, true worshipers worship together regardless of where they are from.

Even when I don't like being in a Chinese Church, it really doesn't matter. Why? Because Jesus said true worshippers worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The idea of worshipping in the temple together with Samaritans are unthinking in the eyes of the Jews. Those people are dirty and half breed, I will never want to become filthy by associating with them. That's religion.

It doesn't matter where I am from or my heritage. Further more, it doesn't matter if there a group I dislike them because of their values are not the same as mine.

Those who follow Christ will worship together regardless. That's the unity.

And to be 'effective' evangelism, witness, outreach....well I have to see how I am worshipping...if I harbor ill feelings of my brothers or sisters because where they are from or which ethnicity they belong too....then that's poor witnessing.

A great sign of being a Christian...is found in Acts 2. All people come together. Have fellowship, break bread, and pray. Unity in Christ.

I thank you Father for your great love of people regardless of where they are

Even when we dislike a certain group or race or religion

Like Jonah and the Assyrians

Yet Your Holy Spirit continue to work through us

And Your Kingdom continue to flourish and grow

I pray that I can be the true worshipper

To worship in True and in Spirit

Regardless of race, gender, language, or other 'barriers'

May I continue to worship beyond race and nationality

Because those who I worship with are my brothers and my sisters.

And we are all adopted children by You.

AMEN!!!

Repost: Everyday Justification

Picked this up from Tim Chester's blog. This is quite a good post on how to live everyday as a Christian. So that now that we are saved, so what? It becomes clear to me, that everyday living, there is a lot of angst, frustration and worries, which digging deeper are me trying to prove myself to myself and others.

http://timchester.wordpress.com/2010/02/10/everyday-justification/

Many of us are confident we’ll be justified on the last day – acquitted before God through the death of Jesus. But what about justification today and tomorrow? Are you still trying to prove yourself?

• Do you ever get angry or brood because you want to prove you’re in the right?
• Does your Christian service feel like joyless duty?
• Do you ever feel the pressure to perform?
• Do you serve others so you can feel good about yourself or impress people?
• Do you look down on others or exaggerate their failings?
• Do you worry that you won’t make the grade in life?
• Do you enjoy conversations about the shortcomings of others?

Reflection
Read Luke 15:11-32. The attitude and behaviour of the father is a picture of God’s grace to us in Christ. Look at the behaviour of the older brother. How do we behave when we don’t grasp God’s grace and our status as his children?

Restless anger
‘The older brother became angry and refused to go in.’ (28) We view life as a contract: we do good works and in return God blesses us. When things go well we’re filled with pride. When things go badly we either blame ourselves = guilt (anger against ourselves) or we blame God = bitterness (anger against God).

Joyless duty
‘All these years I’ve been slaving for you.’ (29) The older son doesn’t see himself as a son at all, but as a servant. The father has his obedience, but not his love. Joyless duty will characterise our attitude if we think of God as an uncaring boss. But when we see him as a gracious Father our attitude will joyful service. Does God the Father have your obedience, but not your love?

Anxious performance
‘I never disobeyed your orders.’ (29) There are people trying to perform day after day in a desperate attempt to prove themselves. They live in a constant state of stress and busyness, always striving to put in another great performance.

Proud comparisons
‘This son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes’ (30). We highlight other people’s faults so we can look better ourselves.

There are acts that look like good works, but in fact reflect a belief that I’m a better saviour than Jesus. That’s why Jesus says: ‘The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.’ (John 6:29) There’s only one thing God wants us to do: have faith in his Son. Everything else will flow from that.

All is not lost. The father goes out to plead with the older brother (28). He welcomes his dissolute son and he welcomes his self-righteous son.

The last part is by far the most reassuring. Reading the Parable of the Lost Son, I never picked up on that the Father welcome both his dissolute and self-righteous son. That's God's grace at its best!

There are moments when I look back, I act self-righteously. To act in pride and self ego and disguise it as Christ-like behavior.

And I am learning, relearning, and relearning....and relearning...to live without the prove of others and myself. There is no need to make the grade in life. Everything that needs to be done is already done.

AMEN!

(Now that's some Good News :D)

Take the first step: asking for forgiveness

In my meditation upon the book of Habakkuk a few nights ago, the LORD has impressed me to go make peace with brothers and sisters who I have wronged them.

With the things I experienced through in the past few days...I am reminded by what Jesus call us to do...love your God and love your neighbor as yourself. Forgive and if you wrong someone, take the first step, be the peacekeeper, and ask for forgiveness.

How important is that?

This is what Jesus has to say...

23"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24)

When my ego was among me, I use to think I don't have to do that. I did nothing wrong. I am right (oh the three words that display my self righteousness!)

He started it. It is his fault. I know I am holding a grudge. I twisted it and consider it a holy grudge. To be honest, in a sick way, I enjoy the grudge. The combination of I am right and angry is a dangerous toxin. It sucks me in and twist what's dark into light and light into dark.

How can I love God if I harbor ill feelings toward my brother and sister? If I am in the latter, I do not love God at all!

I look at Jesus as the prime example. He came down on earth to reconcile men back to God. His ministry is a ministry of reconciliation.

I know it in the head. And now with the conviction of the Holy Spirit I need to live it. And so I go. To ask for forgiveness from those who I have wronged.

Just as Zaccheus commented after having a meal with Jesus , "and if I have cheated anybody out of anything, I will pay back four times the amount." (Luke 19)

I thank my Lord for revealing my iniquities. I need to stop going before the altar and make peace with my neighbors first. And this is all from Jesus, who despite all our sins and wrong doings, died on the cross alone, so that we can be reconcile with God.

What Jesus said when He is dying on the cross...

"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34)

If Jesus can forgive with His last breathe, as His follower, I will follow...willingly..

AMEN!

Let us not our souls to one another

Yesterday during worship, we sing Give Us Clean Hands by Chris Tomlin.

Here is part of the lyric:

We bow our hearts

We bend our knees

Oh Spirit come make us humble

We turn our eyes

From evil things

Oh Lord we cast down our idols

Oh give us clean hands

and give us pure hearts

Let us not lift our souls to another

Oh God let this be

a generation that seeks

that seeks Your face, Oh God of Jacob

In Old Testaments, the idols were asherah poles and objects that man created to worship other gods.

I was listening to Beyonce's Single Ladies on the drive back home yesterday. There was one part of the song that caught my attention:

Your love is what I prefer, what I deserve

Is a man that makes me, then takes me

And delivers me to a destiny, to infinity and beyond

Pull me into your arms

Say I’m the one you WANT

If you don’t, you’ll be alone

And like a ghost I’ll be gone

..to a destiny, to infinity and beyond...from a Christian perspective, only God can do that. Not very tough to connect the dots, in a sense, the role of God is being replace by a man.

From my previous post, I quoted from Tim Keller's The Counterfeit gods that our heart is an idol generating machine. Looking at the modern culture where God is not place in the center, there is a need to place the vacuum role of God with other objects (or in this case, person).

Perhaps we should replace let us not lift our souls to another to let us not lift our souls to one another.