The sermon I was reflecting is from Tim Keller -> http://download.redeemer.com/sermons/And_Kissed_HimF.mp3 [4 min 30 sec into the sermon]
If you stand praying and holding anything against anyone, forgive him. Right there. That's what this parable is illustrating ...we stand on our porches. Well, she started it. He started it. If they want to make it right, fine I will make it right. No. You don't wait for someone to do something. You forgive. You reconcile.
The passage I was quoting from:
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
I was reflecting on this during my afternoon ride.
"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
"I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.
"Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."
As far as I know, Jesus never treated ill toward a pagan or a tax collector. In fact, he called one of them, Levi, to join him. He considered them as lost when the Pharisees asked Him why did He spent all the time with them (sinners and the tax collectors) [Luke 5:30]. He commanded the centurion (definitely a pagan as he would be a Roman citizen) as having the most faith in all of Israel (Matthew 8:10).
[Added: Question: How does the bounding of heaven and earth relate to forgiveness and church discipline?]
Side note: this is one of the rare verses Jesus uses the word, church.
What's more interesting is in the rest of Matthew 18, Peter asked Jesus how often should he forgive his brothers? Not just seven times. But seventy seven times. Then Jesus went on to use a parable to illustrate the mercy of God and the expectation of those who receive His mercy.
This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.