Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Reflection on nervousness and anxiety

The following video was taken back in 2006 on my second Half Ironman.  Before every race, I had a set of rountine.

Taken by my friend, Jenny Cheung.

One of them involve being quiet and reflect on the preparation leading up to a race.

No matter how many triathlons I done, long or short distance, I always have that anxious feeling before a race.  What if I forget to pack something?  What if I can't finish?  What if my bike breaks down?  This and that.

I find the quiet time was the best antidote for that.  This is the moment where I step back and tell myself.  Yes, things might happen on race day I never anticipated.  That's life.  That's uncertainty of a race.  Especially those that I will be going all out and risking it all on the line.  Yes, there is a chance I might pull a muscle or I might blow up.  I might get into a bike crash.

But in this race, I am going to put the nervousness and the anxiety aside. I am going to put it all on the side.


A lot of times in the Christian walk, there are many times when I am nervous and anxious about things.  It can be anything.  Can be bigs and small things.  Can I lead?  Can I teach Sunday School? Can I live up to glorify God?

The questions point to me.  And it is normal to be nervous and normal to be anxious.  So what do we do?  It is at this point where I reminiscence on what God has done for me.

The way He shaped me and protected me in my own life.
The way He called me.
Nothing more is assuring the way Jesus died on the cross for me.  That the plan for me to be His children is to kill the only innocent man on a humiliating death.
And even death cannot conquer Him.  He over come death and took care of the debt once and for all.

When I reflected on that..on what God has done for me..instead of what can I do...the whole scenario changes...surely if the God of the universe, the One who created the heaven and the earth, the one who gave me a liver transplant..the one who took care me before..will surely take care of me now.....

And just like before any of my is time to put those nervous thoughts and anxiety aside..and run the race that I was bestow with full strength..never looking back and always striving forward for the finish line.



Noell Blevins said...

I love it! God never fails! Thanks for letting me hijack some of your thoughts for my blog..... we are kindred spirits!

Tara said...

Oh I love your thoughts today! I too get really nervous before I teach God's word and still I get super nervous before races too! I'm not a big racing girl but like to some, got a team tri next saturday... so glad I'm only swimming!