Used

I sat there with a cup of coffee in my hand.  The coffee wasn't the greatest.  There wasn't any sugar available.  It was bitter and it was stale. There were many sweets and cakes.  I wasn't too hungry.  Nor do I want too much sugar going in my system.

I sat at the corner watching.  For once a week, I go to a food bank and to drop off grocery. It was my friend's initiative.   We wanted to do a grocery run.  To get to know those in Mississauga in need and also to share the gospel and pray for them.  My friend was on call and couldn't make it.  So I went by myself.

Monday night is usually quiet.

Volunteers were sitting around.  Chatting away. They know me as the driver.  I kept to myself.  Over a cup of stale coffee.

I thought about the lists of things I have to do.  Need to set up a schedule for ushering, plan a mission trip, book a hotel when I go to Boston, clean up my room, what I need to read...need to pray....on and on.

For a brief moment, I thought why I am here.  I am here all by myself.  I have far more things I need to do.

I stopped.

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Cliff, you asked for this last year.  You asked God to use you.  Your wish was to go out everyday and go after the lost of the lost in Mississauga.  This is why you are here.  This is why you are tired and you still come out.  Yes, you have many things to do.  This is what you asked for.  And God answered you.  Do you remember?

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As I looked at the few that dropped by to pick up food.  An elderly Asian couple.  Holding plastic bags and carrying a little luggage to carry as much food as they can.  A mother with a twelve year old and holding a baby in her hands. They were picking a box of cereal.  A volunteer asking a gentleman that he could only pick five cans of soup and asked him what flavours he want.  I realized there isn't anywhere else I should be.  Despite my so busy to do list.  Life with all its priorities.  That can wait.


In the book, Good News about Injustice by Gary Haugen, he started off with living in North America where it is safe and free, we tend forget that the rest of the world lies in injustice.  Our home becomes our little lot of green garden. Sure we stress over work and life, we rarely worry about the injustice that occur outside of our plot.

I stared at the rows of canned goods, the food on the table, and the people who needed them. I thought about the little green plot that I live on.  If Jesus is in Mississauga, He would never sit comfortably at His home and read the Bible.  He will be going out after the broken and the needy.  He said it...

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me,
Because He anointed me to preach the Gospel to the Poor,
He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives,
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set free those who are oppressed,
To proclaim the favorable year of the Lord.

(Luke 4:18-19)

I am reminded why I was there.

It was at this time a volunteer struck a conversation with the elderly Asian couple.  He asked them if they needed a drop off with the grocery.

I instantly leaped off my feet and with enthusiasm I said, "Yes, use me. Use my gas.  This is why I am here."

English was not their first language.  Through a heavy accent and a few broken words, we made out where they live. As we went upstairs and put the grocery in my car, I told them that normally I wasn't suppose to drive them.  Because of liability issues, we were only to drop off the grocery.  They would have to walk home.

I looked at them. They were very excited to see my family car and kept cheering it was nice.

I ignored the rules and told them to hop in.

As I drop them at their home, they thanked me for being so kind to them.

I went back to the food bank and thank the volunteer for taking the initiative. It is good to be use sometimes.

I didn't think I was kind.  I simply response to a promise Jesus fulfilled when He came on earth.  He is kind.  For even someone as broken and dirty as myself, I can still be used for His Glory.

Then I said, 
"Woe is me, for I am ruined!
Because I am a man of unclean lips,
And I live among a people of unclean lips;
For my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts."


....


Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying "Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?"
Then I said, "Here am I. Send me!"  

(Isaiah 6:6,8)

Afterward, I had over to Open Door to see if they needed help.  Tomorrow they were giving away clothes.  They spent the night moving clothes from the storage to the store.  As I came in, they just finish.  We joked how great my timing was :D.  Hahaha.

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It's good to be used sometimes.
Especially by the Holy One.