Dirty Hand Confession

The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. (Luke 15:21)

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He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. (Ephesians 4:28)

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It's amazing how the Holy Spirit convicts.  A sin that I committed a long time ago is coming back to haunt me.  It is always in the back of my mind.  Yet subtle enough that I do not give concern of it.  As tonight, though my heart ain't burden by it, I have to ask for forgiveness and make right a wrong I committed when I was at youth.

Oh the humiliation of a dirty hand confession.....

...is needed for reconciliation and a living worship that brings Glory to His Name.

A mark of a mature or growing Christian is a need to repent and to reconcile.  

Not just repentance but to make right a wrong he committed.  Though this might be the most embarrassing moment, it is also the most liberating.  One ought to remember that Jesus suffered the sins from our Father's wrath.  As such, why shouldn't we go and reconcile those sins which we committed before we were adopted? 

It is only through before the Cross. When the Son of God is mocked, ridiculed, scorn, even begotten by His own Father, we see the joy in carrying our cross which is liberating to the soul.  For Jesus already paid the ultimate price.  The only innocent man carry the weight of the world's guilt.  How can we not carry the 'suffering' of the gospel in return?!?

A desire to be His disciple.   A redeemed sinner who counted his costs.  The desire to choose the path of faith and not the path that give delight to the eyes.  A grateful soul who experienced the overwhelming grace with such force that crush his harden walled up heart and cause him to fall down on his knees and bring tears of joy....

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Repentance is not a sign of weakness.  It is a sign of strength and it is liberating.  

[Not my words. Summarize it from Tim Keller's sermons on The Prodigal God]

Confession: Lack of compassion

An email I sent to a friend:

Open Door was very interesting..i walked in and there was a lady waiting outside. She is one of the regular-ers. She was saying how she needed a jacket now and cannot wait for tomrorow.

To be honest, she was very rude and I do not want to help her. After a while we took the clothes from the storage room to Open Door. The lady who is organizing there was very kind to her. The lady who wanted a jacket kept changing her mind and later walked away with two.

She kept saying "God really blessed me, thank you so much" and even kiss the lady (who was in charge) on the hand...

I feel totally convicted..shame on me as i should have more compassion and not less. She needed more help not less.

A little lesson and a reminder. I am here to serve and not to judge. To help those who Jesus will help and not be served.

Shame on me.

Confession, my hinderance to community living

In my previous post, I mentioned about Acts 2 Fellowship. Tonight, over a chat with a few brothers, I made a confession.

The fact is a part of me is repulse by such a fellowship is possible. In Greek, the word for fellowship is koinonia. Based on Wiki, koinonia "implies the spirit of generous sharing or the act of giving as contrasted with selfish getting."

I envision if Acts 2 fellowship were in today's culture, everyone will bring their paycheck and their bills and wealth will distribute accordingly.

The truth, as I was sharing to my brothers, is a part of me find this idea repulsive. I am not secure in the possibility I might get less. I want to get my fair(?) share. What I deserve. Notice the focus is on me (self center thinking).

Yet, at the same time, I am intrigued and excited by such standard of living. It is such beauty that I cannot fathom or conceive.

And so here I am. Wrestle and grapple by such heavenly thoughts. For I have a brief glimpse of what fellowship is like...and I cannot stop thinking about it.